How Parents Can Help Their Children Manage Stress: A Guide

student stress management

The transition from childhood to adolescence is a time of significant change, growth, and sometimes, stress. Parents play a crucial role in identifying and addressing the unique stressors that their children face.

In this comprehensive guide, we’ll explore the sources of stress that young children and teenagers commonly encounter. Will provide insights into recognizing stress in your child, and offer effective stress management techniques for every age. Will also deliver actionable advice for parents on how they can support and empower their children through these challenging times.

Sources of Stress in Young Children

At the tender age of 2 or 3, stress may seem an unlikely challenge for your child. However, young children are highly impressionable and perceptive. The early stages of stress often set the tone for their coping mechanisms later in life.

School-Related Pressures

Even in the early stages of education, children can encounter various stressors linked to their schooling experiences. Transitioning from a home environment to a structured classroom setting can be a significant adjustment, often marked by separation anxiety from parents and caregivers. Additionally, the pressures of navigating social interactions with peers can contribute to a child’s stress levels. Coupled with the academic expectations placed upon them, this can further intensify the challenges they face. These factors combined can create a challenging landscape for young students as they strive to find their footing in the educational system.

Family Dynamics

Home-life plays a pivotal role in shaping a child’s emotional well-being. The dynamics within a family, especially tensions between parents, can deeply affect a child’s sense of security. Events such as divorce introduce a profound change in a child’s life, often leading to feelings of uncertainty and distress. Similarly, the loss of a loved one or dealing with a parent’s illness can disrupt a child’s sense of stability, causing emotional turmoil and anxiety. Each of these situations can have lasting impacts on a child’s psychological health, emphasizing the importance of a supportive and understanding home environment.

Over-Scheduling and High Expectations

In a well-meaning attempt to provide their children with a broad spectrum of experiences and opportunities, some parents might inadvertently over-schedule their kids with a plethora of extracurricular activities. This ambitious scheduling often stems from a desire to give their children every possible advantage in life. However, the high expectations to excel in multiple areas, from sports to music and academics, can lead to feelings of overwhelm and inadequacy in young children. This pressure not only affects their mental well-being but can also stifle their natural curiosity and love for learning, as they struggle to meet the demands placed upon them.

Sources of Stress in Adolescents and Teens

The teenage years, a period often marked by stress, have seen the sources of that stress change over time. What once might have been concerns over academic pressures or social dynamics has now expanded to include the impact of digital technology and social media, making the experience of growing up more complex than ever before.

Academic Challenges

The pressures to excel academically, especially as the complexity of coursework intensifies, can become an overpowering element in an adolescent’s life. The relentless cycle of exams, coupled with the anxiety of maintaining high grades, and the daunting shadow of college admissions, can serve as unyielding sources of stress. This academic strain is further amplified by the expectations from parents, teachers, and peers, adding another layer of tension. As these young individuals navigate through their formative years, they are confronted with the challenge of balancing their personal interests and extracurricular activities with the rigorous demands of their academic pursuits, making this period an incredibly stressful phase of their lives.

Peer Interactions and Social Pressures

Adolescents, navigating the complex landscape of growing up, are profoundly conscious of their social standing within their peer groups. This acute awareness often subjects them to an intense pressure to conform to the norms and expectations of their social circles. The dynamics of bullying, the relentless force of peer pressure, and the often turbulent nature of friendships and relationships during these formative years can significantly contribute to a heightened level of emotional stress. This emotional turmoil is further exacerbated by their developing identities and the quest for acceptance, making this period an emotionally challenging phase of life.

Technology and Social Media

The digital age, marked by rapid technological advancements, has ushered in a unique set of stressors that significantly impact the well-being of individuals, particularly teens. The phenomenon of constant connectivity, where one is always reachable through various digital platforms, coupled with the pervasive fear of missing out (FOMO) on events or interactions, can lead to increased anxiety and stress. Furthermore, cyberbullying presents a relentless form of harassment that can occur at any time, exacerbating feelings of isolation and vulnerability. Additionally, the overexposure to the highly curated, often idealized lives of peers and influencers on social media platforms can distort reality, leading to detrimental comparisons that undermine self-esteem and contribute to a decline in mental health. Together, these digital age stressors pose significant challenges, highlighting the need for effective strategies to support teens’ mental well-being in this complex landscape.

Recognize the Signs of Stress

Children and teens may not always have the verbal skills to express their emotions,and hence it is important for parents to be vigilant in recognizing the signs of stress. Here are some key indicators to watch out for:

Changes in Behavior

A sudden shift in behavior can often be a significant marker of stress, particularly in both adults and children. This might manifest as increased irritability, where minor inconveniences provoke strong reactions, or withdrawal from activities and friendships, indicating a loss of interest in previously enjoyed hobbies or social interactions. In children, stress can also lead to regressive behaviors such as bed-wetting or thumb-sucking, which they had previously outgrown. These changes in behavior are important to notice as they can provide early warnings of stress that, if addressed, can prevent more serious issues from developing.

Emotional Upheaval

Mood swings, tearfulness, and expressions of fear or worry that seem excessive compared to what is considered normal for their age group can be telltale signs of underlying stress. These emotional responses may manifest more frequently or intensely than expected, signaling that the individual is struggling to cope with internal or external pressures. Recognizing these symptoms early on can be crucial in providing the necessary support and interventions to address the root causes of the stress.

Physical Symptoms

Stress frequently takes a physical toll, particularly on children and teenagers. They might suffer from a range of symptoms including persistent headaches, stomach discomfort, and overwhelming fatigue. Additionally, it’s not uncommon for them to experience significant changes in their sleeping and eating habits, which can further impact their overall health and well-being. Recognizing these physical manifestations of stress is crucial for providing timely support and interventions.

Stress Management for Kids and Teens

The good news is that stress can be effectively managed. Kids and teens can learn skills to cope with stress, and parents can create a supportive environment that fosters resilience.

Healthy Habits

Engaging in regular physical activity, consuming a balanced diet, and ensuring quality sleep are fundamental elements for effectively managing stress. By encouraging these healthy habits in children and teens, we help them maintain optimal physical well-being. We also significantly contribute to their emotional health. Building routines of planning and setting goals can also make a tremendous difference as they learn how to manage their time. These practices lay the groundwork for a holistic approach to health that benefits both the mind and body. It also helps fostering resilience against stress from an early age. Cultivating these habits early on can make a profound difference in their ability to handle life’s challenges. This leads to a more balanced and fulfilling life.

Open Communication

Creating an environment where children feel secure in expressing their emotions is fundamentally important. Encouraging open, non-judgmental communication not only alleviates the weight of suppressed feelings but also plays a pivotal role in identifying and tackling the root causes of stress. This approach fosters emotional intelligence and resilience, equipping kids with the tools to navigate their feelings effectively throughout their lives.

Relaxation Techniques

Teaching children and teens relaxation techniques, including deep breathing exercises, progressive muscle relaxation, and mindfulness practices, is crucial. These techniques can play a vital role in mitigating the effects of stress in their lives. By learning to engage in deep breathing, they can calm their mind and body, easing feelings of anxiety. Progressive muscle relaxation teaches them to systematically tense and then relax muscle groups, helping identify and release physical tension. Mindfulness encourages them to live in the moment and develop a non-judgmental awareness of their surroundings. This can significantly reduce stress levels. These techniques not only aid in managing current stress but also equip young individuals with valuable coping skills. These skills will be beneficial for future challenges.

How Parents Can Help

As a parent, you play the most crucial role as your child’s greatest ally in combating stress. Understanding this, it’s important to equip yourself with effective strategies to provide the support your child needs. By doing so, you not only help them navigate through challenging times but also teach them valuable coping mechanisms for life. Here are some detailed strategies to help you support your child effectively:

Be Present

Dedicate meaningful moments to being with your child. Participate wholeheartedly in activities they love, whether it’s playing their favorite games, crafting together, or exploring the outdoors. The key is to be fully present, giving them your undivided attention during these interactions. Your active engagement and presence can serve as a powerful antidote to any stress or anxiety they might be experiencing. This reinforces their sense of security and well-being.

Set Realistic Expectations

Encourage your child to establish achievable goals and realistic expectations for their endeavors. Assist them in recognizing that encountering failure is an integral aspect of life’s journey. It is not an indicator of their inherent value or capabilities. Guide them to view setbacks as opportunities for growth and learning, reinforcing the idea that perseverance in the face of challenges is a valuable life skill. This approach will help them build resilience and maintain a healthy perspective on success and failure. Want to learn more about how to do this? You can read our article on the mindset here. 

Seek Professional Help

Seek professional help immediately if your child’s stress is significantly affecting their well-being. Therapists and counselors have extensive training and experience to offer coping strategies tailored to your child’s needs. They can also provide invaluable support for managing stress, helping your child to navigate their feelings and develop resilience. Remember, reaching out for professional help is a proactive step towards ensuring your child’s mental health and emotional balance.

In conclusion, understanding and addressing the stress that our children face is a critical component of effective parenting. By being proactive, observant, and supportive, we can help our kids manage their stress in a healthy way. This sets them up for a more balanced and resilient future.

Ready to turn your academic struggles into success stories? Discover how personalized tutoring can unlock your full potential. Students, take control of your learning journey today and achieve your goals with the support of experienced tutors. Parents, empower your child’s academic growth by investing in personalized tutoring that delivers real results.

Power of a Growth Mindset: Why It Matters for Your Child

Growth Mindset

Incorporate growth mindset principles into everyday activities to foster a positive attitude towards learning and unleash the full potential of K-8th graders. Excellerate Learning Studio utilizes the Learning Framework – the Four Learning Domains – based on cutting-edge research in learning psychology, science, and technology. Students develop values from the growth mindset and metacognition, applying them to group core sessions or 1:1 sessions. The program promotes goal setting, facing challenges, and productive struggle, empowering students to grow and overcome obstacles. Excellerate is dedicated to nurturing growth mindset through personalized coaching and resources, ensuring a brighter future for children. Foster a growth mindset and witness your child thrive.

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Unlock the Power of Goal Setting with Your Child

Goal Setting

Unlock the Power of Goal Setting with Your Child

Imagine you want to go to a really fun yet important place. You know once you get there, you will have an amazing experience. The problem is…you don’t know where you are going. This poses many challenges. You don’t know how long it will take to get there or how to prepare for it. The panic sets in, and now we are under enormous stress and anxiety.
Picture this: you’re itching for a thrilling adventure, but there’s a catch – you have no clue where to go. Talk about a dilemma! Not knowing the destination means you’re in the dark about everything else too: how long it’ll take, what you should pack, and so on. Suddenly, panic and anxiety hit you like a ton of bricks, leaving you feeling overwhelmed.

Table of Contents

What is goal setting?

Do we really understand the true meaning of “goal setting”? Typically, when we think of setting goals, it’s either in the context of new year’s resolutions or sales targets. And honestly, just the thought of either of those scenarios makes us cringe. But why? What’s the common factor?

It’s the dread that comes with setting goals. We can’t deny that deep down, we know we have an obligation to meet them and produce the desired results. And let’s face it, nobody likes to be evaluated. That’s why we have such a negative association with goals – we feel like we’re being judged when we inevitably don’t meet them.

So what’s the solution? We simply avoid setting goals altogether, as if that will make the problem disappear. We never hear about “family” goal setting, and we don’t feel comfortable teaching our kids how to set goals and use them effectively. But as caregivers, we want nothing more than to see our children achieve anything they set their minds to, driven by their own passion and confidence.

But let’s take a moment here and try to approach goal setting from a different perspective. Traditional goal setting may suck the joy out of the process, but you can change your mindset and view it as setting a destination on a GPS. Goal setting is about visualizing what you want to achieve and creating Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound action steps to get there. It’s about committing to see the desired outcome. With thoughtful planning and clear intentions, parents can provide valuable guidance and empower their kids to make mindful decisions about reaching their goals.

Now, goal setting becomes a series of meaningful decisions that bring us closer to what we truly want to achieve. We often set lofty goals or no goals at all and end up feeling overwhelmed with anxiety. However, by changing our perspective on goal setting, we can easily imagine the kind of life we want for our families.

Why is goal setting important?

Goal setting is important because it helps us to achieve more when have a sense of achievement and build confidence. Have you heard that learning how to make a bed with precision is often part of the routine and training for military cadets? In many military training academies and basic training programs around the world, recruits are taught the importance of attention to detail, cleanliness, and discipline. The process is not just about creating a tidy bed; it is about instilling a sense of order, routine, and pride in one’s work. Making a bed properly is considered a simple yet effective way to instill these values. When we help our kids to learn how to set goals and achieve them, they will earn more opportunity to gain confidence and build intrinsic motivation. 

Goal setting is like plotting a course and having the ability to navigate and adjust along the way. It empowers us to take control and determine our path. Goals are not just destinations; they require skill-building and gradual progress. When we see goals as goals, not destinations, the hardest part is the execution. For example, if I want to run a marathon, I can’t simply do it the next day. I need to train for weeks and months, setting immediate to long-term goals. The execution of goals is often the toughest part, but by setting and working towards them, we can achieve incredible things.

One of the important skills that children learn through practicing goal achievement is persistence. As caregivers, it is our responsibility to help them develop this essential skill by consistently checking in on their progress. Think of this as providing the turn-by-turn directions and recalibration like a GPS system. Our ultimate goal is for our children to become independent learners who take ownership of their own learning and lives. Until then, it’s our job to be a reliable source of support and security whenever they need us, like a pit stop during a race.

Lastly, goal setting helps us understand where we currently stand and what we need for the journey ahead. Have you ever mistakenly selected the wrong mode of transportation and realized it would take much longer to reach your destination? 


Whether it’s a car, bike, train, or even on foot, preparedness is essential. Do we have enough fuel? Is the bike properly maintained? Do we have the necessary funds for the train ticket? What if we want to take a different route? These situations provide valuable learning opportunities for children, teaching them preparedness and self-advocacy skills that will guide them towards their ultimate destination.

So, let’s teach our kids the power of goal setting and watch them thrive.

How to do goal setting

How to help my child to learn to set and achieve goals so they can do anything they set their minds to

Get ready for a fresh start in the new year! Goal setting doesn’t have to be boring – it can actually be a fun and rewarding experience for you and your child! At Excellerate, we’ve got some great strategies to help you, as a parent, guide your kids towards achieving their dreams. We’ll show you how to set attainable goals and develop good habits that promote growth over time.

Even at this young age, it’s never too early to talk to your child about their aspirations and what they want to achieve this year. These goals don’t have to be huge – they can be as simple as trying something new or building on their existing talents.

We’ve got some examples to inspire you and your child. These three everyday activities will make it easier for you to jump into the goal-setting journey.

Grade K-3

In today’s world, it’s important for kids to develop certain skills: consistency and confidence. One way you can help your child is by teaching them to set goals. But as parents, it’s also our role to hold them accountable and help them build strategies for success. By doing this exercise together, you’ll both experience the joy of accomplishing what you set out to do. Plus, it’s a chance for you to praise your child for their achievements along the way.

Let’s define a goalHey, want to level up to Guppy status before summer vacation? You’ve got three levels to go by June, and we still have six whole months. Let’s do this!
Winning strategies

How can we make swimming even more fun for you? Let’s make sure we’re prepared by packing your swimming gear right after dinner. That way, we won’t forget anything and can head straight to the pool after school.

I know you don’t like feeling cold before swimming. How about wearing a cozy hat, gloves, and boots to keep you warm beforehand?

And guess what? After each level you complete, we can go treat ourselves to some delicious ice cream at your favorite spot to celebrate!

Reflection/RedirectionDon’t you love that feeling of accomplishment when you complete a level? You totally deserve some ice cream for all the hard work you’ve put into finishing this level! I understand that going swimming twice a week can be challenging, but let’s stick to the schedule so you can breeze through the next two levels in no time!

Grade 3-5

Starting early makes it easier to follow these suggestions, but it’s never too late to begin! Let me show you an example of how you can help your child set specific goals and take action to achieve them.

Let’s define a goalI get it, reading books regularly can be tough, especially when we’re always tempted to use our devices during our free time. But what if we could find a way to squeeze in 30 minutes of reading every day and still have time for our favorite media?
Winning strategies

Hey, remember when we were chatting about fishing? I was thinking, why don’t we grab a book on the subject? It could be a fun way to learn together!

Speaking of books, I’ve got this awesome recommendation from a friend. Want to read it with me before bed this week?

We’ve got a bit of a drive ahead of us for your basketball game tonight, about 30 minutes. How about making the most of it by listening to some audiobooks? Time will fly by!

Reflection/Redirection

Having trouble reading for 30 minutes straight? How about splitting it into three 10-minute sessions? When would be a good time for you to do this regularly?

I’ve noticed you have a preference for a certain genre of book. How can we discover more books like that? Should we hop online for a search or reach out to the librarian for recommendations?

If your child already has some experience with goal setting, let’s dig deeper and have meaningful discussions. The key is to help them make connections between their goals and the actions they need to take. Sometimes, this means they may have to face failure or deal with the consequences of not taking action. But it’s more important for them to learn how to bounce back from defeat and keep going, rather than just experiencing constant success.

Grade 5-8

We want students to take ownership of their goals, even if they are just starting out. It’s okay to start small and gradually work towards bigger goals. By setting age-appropriate goals, your child can learn to be more independent and confident. This exercise can also help them identify their strengths and make better decisions in their daily lives.

Let’s define a goalHow can you organize your time, so you can continue with the jazz band, basketball team practice and games, and memorizing all the lines for the upcoming musical while you spend some time taking care of pets, turn in all your homework on time, and study for the test, so you can meet the academic expectation?
Winning strategies

Let’s list all the weekly schedule to see how you can fit the time for practices and homework. 

We can see that you can focus better and finish your homework right after your trombone practice. Perhaps, you can schedule to do the homework after practice? 

I love how you organized the digital flash cards, so you can practice your Spanish vocabulary in the car to the games!

Do you like studying with your friends together? Why don’t you invite your friends to study together and play some hoops afterward?

Reflection/RedirectionWhen you have a hard time managing all these activities, you will have to think about the priorities and how you can budget your time to cut some things that don’t work for you?

At this age, we’ll be working with pre-teens or teenagers. Their emotional and mental needs are changing every day, but having clear goals and tackling challenging issues can make them feel more confident and grounded. By regularly doing this exercise, you and your child can discover their learning strengths and develop critical thinking skills for everyday decision-making.

Of course, we need to take a balanced approach, since you know your kids best. Some kids may need more guidance before they can take independent steps, while others may want to take on more responsibility even if we think they’re not ready. As parents and caregivers, we may never feel like they’re fully prepared, but our students are capable of more than we give them credit for. With guidance and a new perspective, they can define their own success and achieve it. Instead of just setting goals, let’s call it a goal achieving plan.

Lastly, let’s not forget to celebrate every small success, as it will lead us to the next achievement.

Excellerate’s Goal Setting Practices


At Excellerate Learning Studio, we believe that setting goals is a crucial part of learning. It sets the foundation for all other areas of growth. That’s why we provide our students with a valuable tool called the “Daily Success Plan” in their group core or 1:1 coaching sessions. This form helps students and our coaches communicate their goals and strategize how to achieve them. It also gives students a chance to reflect on the impact of their actions. We’re committed to creating an environment that encourages a strong habit of setting and achieving both short-term and long-term goals.

In our sessions, we guide our students in practicing several key elements of goal setting and achievement. First, we emphasize the importance of setting clear goals and creating a plan to reach them. This provides direction and clarity, ensuring that students know what they want to achieve and how to get there.

Persistence is also a crucial factor in achieving goals. We teach students the value of staying focused and determined, even when faced with challenges or setbacks. For example, if a student struggles to focus for more than 10 minutes, we help them recognize this and set a goal to gradually increase their attention span. By taking frequent breaks and finding coping strategies that work best for them, they can develop metacognition and improve their ability to concentrate.

We also emphasize the importance of understanding the big picture. By seeing how their efforts align with their long-term vision, students stay motivated and balanced between the daily grind and their ultimate destination.

Intrinsic motivation is another crucial aspect of goal achievement. When students feel motivated from within themselves, they are driven to push forward and put in the necessary effort.

Finally, we emphasize the importance of reflection and learning from experiences. By taking the time to reflect on their progress and make adjustments as needed, students can continue to learn and grow.

Without these key elements in place, students may appear to be working hard but make little progress. By focusing on goal setting, persistence, understanding the big picture, intrinsic motivation, and reflection, we help our students achieve success in the most effective and meaningful way.

Setting goals is a skill that can benefit both children and adults. It teaches us discipline, perseverance, and the value of hard work. By setting achievable and meaningful goals, we can improve our lives and reach our full potential. As parents, it’s important for us to guide our children in this process, preparing them for future success in all aspects of life. Let’s work together to help your child learn this valuable skill.

At Excellerate, our team is dedicated to helping young minds develop goal-setting skills through personalized coaching and resources. Reach out to us and embark on this journey towards a brighter future for your child and yourself. It’s never too early or too late to start setting goals and achieving great things! Let us help your child and you strengthen this important skill today. 

Fill out this form if you want your child to develop this critical 21st-century learning skill as they gain academic strength.

Tools to Use for Goal Setting (aka Goal Achieving)

Excellerate’s Daily Success Plan is a great tool to help us achieve our goals, but sometimes we need a little extra boost. That’s where books, podcasts, and TED Talks come in! If you’re looking for some inspiration, I highly recommend checking out “Thanks!: How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier” by Robert Emmons. It’s a fascinating read that will make you more mindful of the good things in your life. For those who want to understand the importance of finding purpose in their work, Simon Sinek’s “Start with Why” is a must-listen. And if you’re looking for practical advice on achieving your goals, James Clear’s “Atomic Habits” is a game-changer. With these resources at your fingertips, you’ll be well on your way to success!